Recently, I had the opportunity to sit in on a coaching session as a spectator. It was interesting having the “fly on the wall” perspective between coach and client. While all of this transpired on Zoom, body language and tone speak volumes, even on a screen.
The Business coach focused on Mindset. She was straightforward and cussed a little more than what I thought was appropriate, but she had a flare that would slap you in your face with accountability and offered a solid viewpoint. She had a strong presence and posture and just exuded confidence.
On the other hand, the client slouched in her chair and had her arms crossed across her chest. Totally shut down and closed off. Her voice had a quiver and you could almost hear her thoughts say “what on earth am I doing here?” No motivation. No direction. No confidence. She was defeated.
When asked what brought her to a Business Mindset coach, she said that her mom was sick with COVID-19, her sister had passed away two years ago, and she wasn’t getting the clients she needed for her business. She was struggling and looking for direction, and you could hear the depression in her voice.
The coach said, “What does your sister dying have to do with your business?”
I have to believe the client, like me, heard:
“You have to do more.”
“You have to be more.”
“You have to think good thoughts.”
“You be tough, breed what you want in the universe.”
The 5-years-ago-Stefani would have started to spiral thinking of all I needed to improve and would have spent the next six months striving and killing myself to make the impossible happen.
I felt sure this woman was internalizing these thoughts as she listened to her coach. However, knowing what I know now, it was everything I could do not to jump in through the screen and shout, “Give it to God!” You cannot handle what you are going through all on your own!” Like the movie Frozen, I was Elsa shouting, “Let it gooooo…… let it go…… Don’t hold Him back anymore!”
3 truths that have helped me find Christ-like confidence
- He has the confidence to give you and confidence in you!
“It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man.”
Psalm 118:8 - You aren’t enough… alone.
“My flesh and my heart fails; but God is my strength of heart and my portion forever.”
Psalm 73:26 - Taking action looks different with God on your side.
“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
Isaiah 41:10
He has confidence to give you and confidence in you!
Do you know the story of Jehoshaphat? (check out 2 Chronicles 20)
Here is a quick summary:
An enormous army of enemies gathered by the Dead Sea near Jehoshaphat’s village. Immediately Jehoshaphat went into “action”. He prayed to God, planned a fast for all the villagers, and listened to what God would lead him to do. God told Jehoshaphat to lead the people out to meet the invaders, and instead of fighting, they were called to worship.
Did you know you cannot deplete God of His confidence? You can always pull from his strength. It is important to note that when God spoke Jehoshaphat followed suit. He placed his confidence in Him.
You aren’t enough…Alone.
Eek, I said it. You aren’t enough. It goes against every good feeling meme out there, but we aren’t unless we have God attached to us at the hip. We need Him with us.
He said: “Listen, King Jehoshaphat and all who live in Judah and Jerusalem! This is what the Lord says to you: ‘Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God’s.” 2 Chronicles 20:15
Maybe you feel very afraid. Maybe you feel like you are constantly standing on shaky knees before a vast army. Maybe you feel battle-worn. I totally get it. I have been there!
However, know, that God is standing right beside you. Bigger. Stronger. And never tired. As humans, we try to do more, be more, and get it done all on our own, it’s vital [actually, fundamental] that we give it to God and remember whatever your battle is at the moment, is not even yours to fight. It is His.
Taking action looks different with God on your side.
Look back in these verses of 2 Chronicles 20. What did God ask the people to do as they were living in fear of the upcoming enemy attack? Pray and worship! When we need an extra dose of confidence, take time to count our blessings and see all the times God led the way. We can build faith in what He will do by remembering what He has already done.
“Give thanks to the Lord for his love endures forever.” 2 Chronicles 20:22
No one can stand in your way when you are doing as God leads, I mean no one.
He said: “Listen, King Jehoshaphat and all who live in Judah and Jerusalem! This is what the Lord says to you: ‘Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God’s. 2 Chronicles 20:15
Confidence comes directly from the Father, and it is so beautiful. Maybe today you are able to lean fully on Him for all the battles that are ahead of you in your path. It is also possible, that you feel like that vast army is way bigger than what you have to give. Me too sister, I have been there. He is fully aware and ready to provide just what you need when you need it.
You will never hear me say this will be easy. There are days we are the Mindset Coach, full of confidence, and other days we are the client, feeling crushed by what life threw in our path. It can be overwhelming looking at that vast army or standing on battle-worn legs. But, remind yourself not to be afraid or discouraged, the battle is not yours but God’s, so take action, my friend. The action of giving it to Him. The one who has your perfect, yet maybe a little bumpy, path laid out.
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