Here’s a truth for you: Life is hard.
My “hard” is life as a working momma. Several years ago, I walked into parenting and a new level of leadership in the corporate world at the same time, and I was not at all ready for this new season. I felt blindsided and berated by the fact it was even an issue. I worked for an organization where women were promoted, but once I moved up to a certain level, I felt no confidence that I could balance all that was needed to thrive both at work and at home. It frustrated me that no one warned me just how hard it would be!
Your “hard” could be a life change (a death in the family, a divorce) or coming to terms with the fact that you are the one in your group who may never birth children. The circumstances are different, but the season is just as hard.
If you’re anything like me, when times get tough, doubt starts to settle in, and I start to lose confidence.
Do I really deserve to be here if I find it this difficult?
I’m not confident I can do this.
Would God have really called me to do this thing if the road was going to be so difficult?
This tough season of my life brought me so low. I lacked confidence, I was not prepared, I was not ready, and I did not have a good plan in place for how to combat my difficulties, so I tried to be someone I wasn’t, someone I thought I should be, just to get through it.
This is also the season of life when I read my Bible all the way through for the first time, and boy did the holy spirit reveal some things to me! God’s Word helped me realize that I’d been looking for hope, faith, worthiness, and confidence in all the wrong places.
Here are 3 things I learned during that season.
1) Submit it ALL to God (Yep! All of it!)
2) Stop doing it on your own
3) TRUE confidence comes through Christ (We are wonderfully made!)
1) Submit it ALL to God
At this time, I was saved, but I wasn’t walking closely with Jesus. I did not know how to talk with Him, and walk with Him, and grow closer to Him. Mostly, I guess I really didn’t know how to turn my life over to Him and submit.
I have a Christian work colleague who gave me a popular passage from Proverbs 3 to read, but it was so well known that it went in one ear and out the other before I gave it an ounce of reflection.
TRUST IN THE LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways, submit to Him and He will make your path straight.
-Proverbs 3:5-6 (emphasis mine)
Let’s look carefully at the first sentence here… Who are we trusting in? The Lord. And what are we NOT trusting in? Our own understanding.
It also gives us a great directive here: In all your ways, submit to Him.
2) Stop doing it on your own
Here’s another truth for you: You are enough… but you aren’t meant to go it alone.
You don’t have to have a perfect plan or have it all figured out when you’ve submitted to the Lord (that’s HIS job, friend, and trust me… He is WAYYYY better at it than you or I could ever hope to be)! We need Him with us as we walk through life. AND, when you’re walking with the Lord, God goes before you. “He will never leave you nor forsake you” (Deuteronomy 31:8). It’s a lot easier to be confident when we know we have God with us basically attached to our hip!
Before this revelation, I had been taking the responsibility of feeling worthy and feeling confident on personally, as if it was something I alone could achieve out of sheer will, but the Word helped me understand that my worthiness came from God, and it began before I was born.
If you’re currently struggling in a season of doubt, or you’re lacking confidence, I see you. I’ve been there.
As I moved up the ladder in my red bottom high heels (just kidding, I still do not own those!), I was trying to be someone I wasn’t. I am an Enneagram 8 and a D on the DISC which means I am loud, direct, results-oriented, and always push the status quo… all traits that sound great for a leader (and also known for being more masculine vs. a submissive sweetheart). But I am a momma, a dreamer, a wife, an aunt, and a friend (all things that are sweet and soft).
I wanted to thrive in my strengths while still embracing the softer parts of my wonderfully made self. Even if it looked different than others in the boardroom. And even if they seem counterintuitive.
Give your “hard” (and everything else!) over to the Lord. Trust in Him and grow your confidence through Him.
I’ll repeat it because it’s important: TRUE confidence comes through Christ.
When I was finally bold enough to embrace my God-given strengths, it led me to quit my job, start two businesses, and move into a life of passion and purpose. Psalm 139 reminds us that God wonderfully made us on purpose. Now I get to help women who are struggling in the corporate world because my strength of challenging the status quo enables them to think differently for themselves.
And guess what? Following God’s call hugely increased my confidence. I know I am right where I am supposed to be. To quote Chris Tomlin, “I know who goes before me, I know who stands behind,” and knowing that God both led me here AND has my back, is a confidence-builder like no other.
If you’ve been around Women, Worship and Work for any length of time, you’ve probably heard about how reading the Bible all the way through radically changed my life. There are important truths for you in Scripture, friend, and I’d love to share some around confidence!
Grab your FREE download: 5 Biblical truths about Confidence, in lay (wo)man’s terms (see what I did there?!), to make them super easy to understand.